Monday, November 3, 2014

Snohomish River Run Race Report

I registered for this race as a package with the Women's Half race by the same company last spring. I don't precisely remember what the discounted price was but for two half marathons it was a good deal and I thought having to races on the calendar would help me build a base and keep me motivated.

This did not happen.

My spring half marathon was a disaster. This had nothing to do with the actual event which I thought was nicely run, well supported and had a flat route. Yes, the route was a little dull and had a SOUL KILLING switchback at the end. But I was crazily undertrained so it was not a shock that I struggled just to finish the race.

After that race I felt so demoralized and pissed off at myself that I . . .didn't run some more! We moved over the summer and the lead in to getting our old house ready to rent and finding a new house and then moving the kids and BLAH did not lead to steady running. I am a crappy summer runner to begin with so this gave me just the push I needed to do NOTHING.

Coming into this race I knew that my self-esteem could not handle a bad half like the spring event. I am comfortable with the kind of runner I am - very slow and steady - but quitting made me feel like I would never get going again. It shook my confidence. So I dropped down to the 10K for this event and let the half goal go.

This turned out to be a great decision as I didn't train well for this race either but I can do a 10K regardless. Leading into the race my longest run in a month had been four miles so this was not a PR race for me.

The Snohomish River Run is put on by the Snohomish Running Company. It is supposed to feature a fast and flat and certified course. They promote it as being very PR friendly. The women's event last spring was that very thing and a lot of ladies seemed to PR. JR ran the River Run last fall and had a great event and time in his lead up to the Seattle Marathon. The course featured an awful switchback at the end that made the last few miles mentally very difficult. It also had an awful lot of dull highway running. For this event, and I assume going forward, they moved the course. The start is now in downtown Snohomish and the course is a little more scenic with the run going over the bridge and along the river. The start was strange, however, because it began with an immediate switchback less than a quarter of a mile into the race right back over the starting line. It was confusing, congested and just plain weird. Anyone looking for a fast start was just plain out of the luck because people were confused by it. Also, the half marathoners had to dodge 10K runners who were milling around for their start. It made what could have been an energized start feel flat and frantic - it beats the hell out of finishing with a switchback but given that the road along the river does go farther it seemed like a weird choice. I imagine it had to do with road closures.

The controversy in this race was that the 10K turn around was poorly marked. Actually it was unmarked and was supposed to be manned by a race volunteer who was late. Many if not most people missed the turn. My garmin died on the run (we had a storm the night before the race so I was scared to plug it in and have a power surge wreck it) so I am still not sure exactly how far I ran - it was farther than a 10K but I don't know how much. Some one was at the turn around when I went by but I thought he was a race marshall and I went right past him. I do not understand why there were not big signs and a person there. Snohomish Running Company did offer all 10K runners a discount on a future race but they are being kind of rude on their Facebook page to people complaining. I am sure they are tired of the complaints but this was not a cheap race and is not a charity race. Having your only marking at the turn around be a person is dumb and easy to miss and people are right to complain.

The new course is not as flat as the old one but is still very flat for this area. There is a long but very slight and gradual incline on the route back with the only real hill being the uptick to the bridge. The finish was very congested and awkward. It looked like the had plenty of volunteers and after race food but the area was MUCH too small to support it all. There were tons of volunteers and spectators walking into the finish area and blocking runners because there was nowhere else for them to walk.

My race actually didn't go too bad at all. I took the first 3 miles easy, running around 12:30 per mile. I felt really comfortable until I missed the turn and felt like I had to push a bit to get back. I really pleased that I had the legs to do that at all and I felt great until after mile 5. I've been having a lot of problems with numbness and burning in the balls of my feet and they were on fire at that point. My last mile (or two because WHO KNOWS) were pretty slow and awful. My final time was 84:36 which is way off my PR but in the results it lists my pace as 11:39 which means they think most 10K runners went over 7 miles. I think the truth for me is probably somewhere in the middle and I had wanted to finish in under 80 minutes so I think I would have done that without the turn issues. I am not much of an eater after races so I headed out pretty quickly.

Pros: Parking is quick, easy and free. The event recommends parking at Snohomish High School but easy parking was readily available on the street even closer to the start. There were plenty of volunteers available and lots of porta potties (something a lot of races do not do well). The volunteers at the water stops were encouraging and helpful and they had both water and electrolyte mix available as well as GUs.

Cons: That switchback at the beginning boggles my mind, it made the start very slow and awkward. The course is still not very scenic given the location and the lack of route marks was ridiculous. Moving the route to downtown Snohomish didn't add any atmosphere and didn't help the route. The staff is probably tired of being harassed about the 10K turn around but their attitude in public forums like Facebook is off-putting (though the email they sent offering a discount was nicely worded and generous). The t-shirt is supposed to be a tech tee but isn't something I would run in and is quite small. It looks almost identical to the one from the women's race last spring and considering the gorgeous long sleeve tech tees that they gave out last year I think it is disappointing. The medal design is almost identical to previous races as well so not fun for collecting but they are very nice medals.

I am not sure if I will do this race again. It is very convenient to my house and decently priced. And I love a small race. But it feels like the event took a big step back in the move and I am not sure they understand that. Unfortunately Snohomish Running Company bought one of my favorite races Everett's Hero's Half  (it is not reassuring to me that it says the site will be up by 10/31 and it is not up on 11/3), and I am worried they will not run that one well at all.

Monday, May 19, 2014

Ugly Race Report

J's surgery and my new job ate my training.

I just didn't have time to train and my schedule changed enough that I couldn't go as early in the morning as I am used to. The truth is that this happens - you have to roll with the punches in training and once you have a family and a career you cannot plan your life around training.

The worst was I just lost steam. I didn't just miss training I just stopped running. Even though my body wasn't tired I just felt burned out on running. It is true that I was having some foot issues (something I still haven't sorted out) and my muscles are TIGHT (stretching and rolling help but seriously, I do not understand WHY I am so tight, I am ridiculous). But mostly I just lost momentum. For me, and I suspect a lot of people, running is this habit that builds on itself. I run and I feel great so I want to run more. I run more and I have endorphins and my body looks better and I eat better and I feel even better. I sleep great, I am more relaxed and calmer and that habit is cemented. The reverse is also true. I stop running and I feel my aches and pains. I start to eat like absolute shit. I am more stressed. And I am out of the habit. I think my running routine can survive a little ebb and flow but it is amazing how quickly progress can be lost.

My race was yesterday. It did not go well. In fact, I cannot imagine many scenarios where it could have gone worse.

To start - the good. The race I ran was the Snohomish Women's Run and it was a gorgeous race. Beautifully organized, so many volunteers, great aid stations and the medals and t-shirts were beautiful. This is my first race where I had a personalized bib which was a fun touch (and people were great about cheering my name when I came by). The course was beautiful (though it featured one switch back at the end that was AWFUL because I hate that feeling of it going on and on and on) and flat. If I had put the training in that I had originally planned this is a great course to PR on. The great news is that I registered for the sister race - the Snohomish River Run - this fall (they offered a great package) so I am trying to view this as a preview run.

So the bad. First, my training was not there. My muscles were so tight and I just didn't have it. Not a bit. This was a fairly flat course and I should have been able to get into a nice rythym but I honestly felt draggy almost from the beginning. Being a long event I had a couple of miles in there that felt good. I tried to enjoy them while they were happening - but there were just a few. There was a long out and back section and normally I hate this in a course but I liked it here because it was fun to cheer on the super speedy 10Kers and later the half marathoners (I was back of the pack all the way). That made the miles click by in a nice way. Everyone on the course was supportive of each other and even though I was much slower than I should have been and clearly struggling I never felt anything but supportive by the volunteers, race officials and the other racers. Unfortunately I had GI distress beginning at mile 3. I have NEVER had to so much as pee during a race (though hats off to a women's only race because all the porta potties even at the start were SO CLEAN. even after the race they were hardly even smelling, never at a race has a toilet been so nice) but I was in a lot of pain and discomfort very early on. That set the tone because the cramping never fully eased and I never really got hydrated correctly.

The drag about that is that my positive attitude really didn't hold after that. I tried several fuel sources - including bloks, chews and even GU. Nothing sat well in my stomach and I didn't fuel well (one of many downsides to being so slow is that fueling because weirdly out there so long means you need fuel even more than the speedsters - it is easy to bonk when you run for three hours). I didn't want the fuel but I felt so awful I kept trying it. The weather was supposed to be cold and rainy and we were lucky to get bright sun and warmer temps. I personally loathe running in the heat (this is relative heat I mean I think it was 65) and I actually got a little burned. The sun was nice but I think I didn't manage the salt intake well and with the GI issues things went pear shaped. I threw up a couple of times - mostly just water - but it didn't help my discomfort.

I was lucky and met a really nice woman on the course. She was running a much slower pace than I meant to do but she had the best attitude and kept me going. Towards the end she basically was dragging me to the finish. Since we didn't know each other she didn't know that I am stubborn and cheap so I wasn't quitting unless I had no choice so she kept worrying that I was going to quit. It is true that when we hit the 10K turnaround and I had already hit the porta potty twice that I considered downgrading myself to the 10K. But after that I really didn't consider quitting. Though I really wanted to quit so many damn times. I have always wanted to find my running tribe and a buddy and I enjoyed her so much. Best part of the race for me - I am hoping that she and I can do some training runs together.

The last couple of meals were rough. I bonked badly, I was so tired. I sent my buddy ahead because she had a shot at a PR (which she got) but I had no ability to help her. But J and my daughter had come and R ran me in. I didn't want her to see me struggling like that (I always want her to see me as strong) but maybe it is great for her to see that sometimes the things we want are not easy and you just have to keep going.

Today I am sore but it isn't as bad as I expected. I am plotting my summer and how to get back into the groove again. I am thinking of going for a 5K PR as I haven't really run one in a long time and my PR is slow so I could pick it up with a little hustle.


Saturday, April 12, 2014

Shorts

I have never had a pair of running shorts.

It isn't that I don't own any or haven't tried many of them on. I have tried on almost every damn short in my local running store. I own a couple of pairs. It is that they don't fit me and if I think about it long enough I am filled with rage.

Go to a road race and you will see every body shape and size known to man. This is particularly true in the women's race - because women of all body types are taking to racing. But you wouldn't know it from the selection of clothing available to runners.

I read this snarky comment from a fast running blogger about how she thought it was so WEIRD that so many women run in capris instead of shorts and how they must be insecure about their bodies and not REAL runners and it was awful and bitchy and I won't link her here because she is clearly ridiculous. And it was also missing the point. I think most people are wearing capris because they don't want the chafing on their thighs.

I don't have the classic runners body. I know that this doesn't matter. My body is strong and I love to run. I just wish that the running companies (including the ones that claim that they are fitting a real women's body) would look at other body types. It looks like they are fitting their elite runner and then scaling it up. And then not trying it on the larger size. I have a small waist and big hip ratio. I have large thighs. So the shorts all slide at the waist and squeeze in the legs and ride up like you cannot imagine. It is not flattering, it is not functional and it pisses me off.

Google women's running shorts that fit and you will see running board after running board with women with my problem. We've all tried the big brands like Nike and the small brands like Oiselle. And nothing fits.

I keep looking though, summer is coming after all. And maybe one day I will find that short for me. Until then I still want to punch that blogger in the face.

Friday, April 11, 2014

Letting Go

The last month has been a damn training disaster. JR has had two surgeries - injuries and nothing life threatening but it means he can't do any child care or household work. I started a new job. The baby is teething. It is . . just a lot.

I often am smug about how you make time for what is most important to you and I think that is largely true. But when your life explodes even the important things fall apart. I haven't honored my training program - not one bit - and my race is in a month.

I am starting to panic.

Though I keep saying this is my comeback race and I just want to finish the truth is I was planning to PR. And I was planning to PR by a LOT. This sounds crazy because the baby is not even seven months old and I didn't run while pregnant and I had a c-section. But the truth is my Half PR is actually pretty slow even for pokey me. I did both races within three weeks of each other and I was undertrained. So while I am incredibly proud of those finishes and I feel like they are achievements I wanted a faster time. And I had this weird plan to just crush my PR and act surprised.

That is not going to happen now.

Now I am back in the realm of struggling to finish. I don't feel strong. My legs and core are just not quite where they should be yet. Four weeks is not a lot of time to get into that place. It is more than possible that I will finish slower than I did before.

In the big scheme of things this does not matter at all. I will finish. It is my comeback! But it is still hard to let that dream go.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Riding the Natural High

I like to make a terribly unfunny joke comparing running to bipolar disease and it is not only unfunny but insensitive and it isn't like I really know anyway but I stand behind it in the most wishy washy way possible. What I mean is that some days running is just AWFUL. Your legs feel tired and heavy. You can't get a rhythm. Your favorite treadmill is taken or maybe it is raining. Running is just an asshole and some days are just like that. There is a weird achievement in overcoming that and running anyway I guess and I am never exactly SORRY that I ran. But occasionally a workout puts me in this frame of mind that my goals are unachievable and why am I doing this and I've made no progress and DIE RUNNING DIE. They don't happen all the time but in a training cycle you know you are going to have a couple. At the end you might have a couple in a row.

The flip side is that occasionally, sadly more rarely than asshole days but still they happen, you have a great run. Nothing is different - maybe you don't run faster than normal but it feels easier. That change in your stride you are working on just feels good and natural today. Your play list hits every song just when you need it. The sun is shining but you aren't hot and your outfit looks good but is also functional. And you just fucking NAIL THAT WORKOUT.

The result is that you feel like you are making progress! You are a real runner! Your pants feel looser and your calves look defined and you are going to kick ass at that goal race. You are all over this!

The difference in these two runs? May be like ten seconds of actual time. But a good one sets you up all day (best payoff of being a morning runner, I just had a tremendous day today I swear my kids were even cuter and better behaved).

Most runs are between this, they have good things and bad. You will always have miles full of doubts and miles full of joy. The bad runs harden your resolve, they make you hungry to prove that dark place wrong. The good runs are like a drug you can't shake. That feeling hits all sorts of buttons of achievement and natural chemicals.

I had a great run this morning. I hit my paces. I felt great. My feet felt light and my turnover was strong. My legs got tired but I could push through it. Yes, I white knuckled the last quarter mile but I was smiling while I hung on for dear life.

This weekend I was despairing about my half marathon - worrying that maybe I couldn't come back from having a baby. Maybe it was too hard for me. Now I feel refreshed in that goal. I don't have a time goal I have a finish smiling and feel great about my training goal.

And a secret time goal, I can't help myself.

Saturday, March 1, 2014

Running Dr. Jeckyl and Mr. Hyde

I ran at the gym before work twice this week. I did three miles each time, and ran similar paces. the strange part how different the two runs felt. Tuesday my legs felt dead and I had to PUSH myself to hid my modest pace goals. Every step felt like a struggle. I never got into a groove and when I finished instead of a good high or an aura of smug accomplishment (both of which I am usually sporting after an early morning run). I just felt beat up. Thursday I ran the same distance, in a similar way but afterwards I felt amazing. It felt like a run that had a purpose for my training, it made me feel stronger and more powerful.

Sometimes running is an act of faith. There are runs that are truly terrible. They hurt, they make you feel bad about yourself and your training. And all you can do is keep moving, keep working, and trust that the bad moments will pass. I am sure there are tons of lessons that can be applied to other things in life here but mostly I just keep putting one foot in front of the other and trust that eventually it will feel great again.

Two treadmill runs both under 12 minute pace. 12:15-12:30 long interval pace with one minute periods of 10:30.

I had a root canal Thursday and since then my face has erupted and swollen and I am on a ton of antibiotics and pain killers. So my long run this morning didn't happen. Hoping that it will feel better tomorrow so that I can get a nice easy long run in the morning.

Sunday, February 16, 2014

Mulligan

My race training was supposed to begin this week. I chose a 15 week plan because I feel like for both of my previous races I was under-trained. I had only one run over ten miles. In both races (they were just three weeks apart) I struggled BADLY after ten miles. I just felt unprepared and my brain just shut down trying to push me towards the finish line. The longer plan has several runs over that ten mile marker and just more miles overall It was the plan I was using before becoming pregnant and dropping out of the half marathon last year. This was week 1 of that plan. And I failed at week 1. Failed badly.

Tuesday was great, 4 strong miles in the gym before work. But I had an ugly, embarassing weird injury in the middle of the week and didn't run the rest of my plan. Objectively I know that no one has failed at a race because they skipped a short run with strides. But I admit that those zeros in my training log make me feel uneasy. I think that this is common. Most runners I admit that do events have that obsessive side of their personality. They devote a lot of time trying to sort out the best way to get across the finish line.

Now this week is my chance to get going on the right track. We will see if I can get a couple of speed workouts in and work past this slow start.

Monday, February 3, 2014

Race Ready

When I got pregnant I was training for a half marathon. My previous two races at that distance had been great accomplishments but poor finishes and I really wanted to train better for my next try. I felt so strong and was about a third of a way into the cycle when I found out I was pregnant. I couldn't keep up the training and eventually stopped running.

While I was still pregnant I had a feeling of loss about that training cycle. That sounds really stupid, especially since I really wanted another baby and I was much more worried about my age for pregnancy then my fitness routine. But still, I had invested a lot in that cycle and it was going so well. So I kept focusing on my comeback that I could get back to how I felt like I did during that cycle. I spent all the time rubbing that thought between my fingers, just trying to move forward until I could try again.

Coming back has been harder and easier than I expected. It was easy to get in the groove again, easy to start training. But it has been more painful than I anticipated. And less linear. Under normal circumstances each run builds on itself and you can feel yourself progressing. But I am stutter stepping forward. I get better one week and then the next every step hurts. It takes a lot of faith to keep moving. I had thought I would try another half in March, no time goal, just completing the distance again would feel like a win. A post baby PR. I had an April race in the back of my head as a back up. By the time it was November I knew that initial race was too much of a stretch for me. It was just too soon. I wasn't able to log the miles, my body wasn't recovering the way I wanted it to. . .Last week I realized that I really needed to get into a cycle if I wanted to do the April race. And it scared me.

I typed up my training plan and started to worry. I just didn't feel ready. Every run seemed scary - even without a time goal. I had actual doubts about finishing.

And then I got an email about a new women's half debuting on a great course nearby. They were even offering a discounted buy in. Sold. That gives me three extra weeks to get ready for my training. I didn't realize that it was weighing on me so much until I changed my focus. Then it was clearing the right decision. Now I am excited about starting out and sure I can finish it. I can't imagine PRing this race so I will still be at the back of the pack. But I can finish. That feels huge at this stage.

Last week was a sluggish one.
4 miles treadie on Sunday - progression run
3 miles HITT on Thursday
6 miles road on Saturday - 1 mile finish on hill repeats


Saturday, January 25, 2014

Gear Score

Running articles love to trot out the idea that running is a fitness activity that doesn't cost any money. All you need is a pair of shoes and you can run. This always makes me laugh because man runners LOVE spending money on running. Sure you do see some grizzled old runners about in big cotton t-shirts and tube socks sans watch and everything else. But most runners I see like to invest in gear that makes running more comfortable and allows them to run their best. Moisture wicking clothes top that list because after a sweat heavy workout in a cotton shirt you are likely to have giant chafe marks ripped in your skin.

For me the big national brands like Nike and Under Armour have not worked. I do not have a typical runners body - I have big thighs (and not the runner's big thighs where they still have thigh gap) and a booty but with a smaller waist and I have boobs. A lot of the bigger brands seem to have taken their best men's styles and shrunk them down and made them pink. I think this works well for a lot of slimmer runners and they have no problems. Stores like Lululemon and Athleta have challenged those brands by making tech clothing that also looks great. My issues with those stores are primarily about function - sometimes they are so cute but maybe not as practical as I would prefer. And price. I don't mind investing in workout clothing but $100 running pants seems crazy. I also don't love the founder of Lululemon and would like to not ever give him my money.

So I have spent a lot of time experimenting. I have a few things from Road Runner (my favorite running store) that are very functional and practical (but sadly not always so flattering). I have a couple of things from the Gap that are pretty good but seem to be SLIGHTLY more about lifestyle than actually working out. And I do have one Lululemon shirt (that I bought at the outlet with a gift card so I try to tell myself they didn't make any money off of me) that had been my favorite - as much as I loathe the company it was just so nice and light and not too warm in hot weather and not cold in cool weather and it never even smells. But it just made me crazy it was Lulu and I wouldn't buy another.

Out of the blue JR bought me this from Oiselle. Oiselle is a Seattle running company that makes functional but stylish running apparel for women. Their shorts sadly don't work for me - but I have yet to find any that do - but their capris are the best around. This shirt is now my top choice for every outdoor run. Just as functional as the Lulu - it even has great hand coverage and is the perfect length and never rides up. At $66 it is an indulgence (and an amazing gift) but I love it and I find myself choosing it every time.

Imagine my excitement to go to a Oiselle sample sale this morning. I got another Flyte top, two lux layers (which seems to be discontinued) and a tank top (and shorts for my girl Linda). My share was under $100. For their quality and how cute and comfortable everything is (I tried on one of lux layer shirts when I got home and uh never took it off - I didn't even run and my mom tried to steal it) that feels like free.

I am still on the quest for running shorts (if I am ever going to turn myself into a summer runner they are a must) that don't provoke the chub rub but my work out wardrobe feels like it is in great shape.  I have grand plans to go to their next sale and drag Linda with me (we can run after so it will feel healthy).

No run today. Hopefully a long run tomorrow.

Thursday, January 23, 2014

Pacing

I have a hard time hitting specific paces. Training plans call for miles at ten seconds slower than race pace or something similar and I don't have that kind of muscle control. Honestly I can either run by effort or I can run at max speed. I can't manage my pace to the level that these plans call for - and I am surprised that other rec runners can.

Last week I tried to finish my run up with some strides. I can manage a sprint at the end but I did two too quickly and one too slowly. I am not sure that missing the paces means that that part of the workout is wasted or not.

My best speed workouts seem to happen by accident. Maybe my legs warm up quickly on the treadmill and I can ladder up the pace easily. Sometimes I still feel fresh after a couple of miles on the road and I will do some strides. But, more often than not, I mispace them badly and they end up being short runs with some fast and some slow miles. It doesn't seem productive.

I was reading about doing downhill workouts to build up a higher foot turnover rate. I definitely do not have the muscle strength and cardio ability to power up speed. My stride is short enough that building turnover is the way to go. It seems like it is the first thing to go when I tire, my posture stays good but it gets challenging to keep the feet churning, even when I am not struggling with the cardio bit. The training plans make increasing turnover sound simple but I find that I really have to focus and even then it is easy to let it taper off. Suggestions seem to be to run at these paces to get better at running paces. It is not so useful for those of us who are already struggling with it.

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Wednesday HITT

Rough workout this morning. The baby slept in (not a bad thing) until five (I know) so I got to the gym late. I only had a short period time so I just hammered out two miles at a ladder pace. I've been trying to stack my runs on back to back days to give extra fatigue to my legs a bit. I've been doing ok on the short to mid runs but building endurance has been tougher. Sometimes I feel like if I max out my legs than I might have a better shot at building them up a bit.

For some reason I just had to white knuckle it this morning. From the beginning my legs felt dead and heavy. Even my warm up felt like drudgery. By the time I was hauling at my max speed (and believe me I am still pokey I think it was 10:30 pace) I was playing games in my head to hang on. The first mile I did breath counting - I concentrate on getting a good rhythm of breathing going - nice and slow - and count to thirty. I can usually get a quarter of a mile in per thirty count. I tried to watch the TV on my machine but ESPN was annoying this morning and I settled on the movie Juno. This was weirdly the worst movie to try to run HITT to - just too slow a pace.

I managed to hang on for two miles and it was worth it. With my current schedule I just have to squeeze in even short runs to get my miles back up. I admit that it is hard to get back on track with little two milers, especially when I am not really up for running every morning.

There is a satisfaction in sticking out a run that isn't going well (even if it is short). It makes you feel smug to have worked out when you didn't want to. And it is undeniable that I get that physical boost from the run. But a workout like that hangs in your mind, makes you wonder if you will ever get back on track and it leaves this bad taste if your mouth.

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Long Term Committment

Most runners are obsessed with their shoes. Drop into any running message board and you will see endless threads comparing different brands and models. My pal Linda and I have email streams that go on for days about shoes - and we wear the same model.

There seem to be two camps with running shoes. Some people find a model they like and buy that model until they can't get it anymore - some of them won't even buy the newest edition. The other camp seems to jump around and trying to find the newest thing.

I am definitely in the first camp. I wear a Mizuno Wave Rider 17 and I am semi obsessed with them. My first running shoes were the Wave Rider 15 (wait this isn't true I had a pair of Brooks that were stability shoes which I shouldn't be wearing that I wore first but the Wave Riders were my first shoes that made me feel like a runner) which is a shoe model you will find so much hate for on the internet it will make you worry about people. People were ANGRY about that shoe. But since it was my first pair of properly fit shoes I adored them and eagerly upgraded to the 16. The 16 is the shoe that changed everything about running for me. They were lighter and fit me perfectly. I never had any joint pain. I was semi heartbroken when after my pregnancy it became clear I had too many miles on them. So my gift to myself after six weeks of running again was an upgrade.

The 17s are so different from the 16s it is hard to explain. They are stiffer but also so much lighter it is hard to believe. When I bought my 16s they were perfect from the beginning, no break in period at all. But it has taken me about forty miles to get my 17s just right. Now they mold to my foot and they have great grip on the road. If you don't have a shoe that you love this way get thee to a running store (I love Road Runner) and get fitted. Take your time, run in the shoes and purchase them somewhere that will let you have a few workouts with them before you committ. With luck you will find the shoes that you will buy for years to come.

This morning I did a speed workout at the gym before work. I did a progression on the treadmill for 2.5 miles, just gradually increasing the speed until it was a hard charge for the last two minutes. The best shoes fade into the run and you hardly notice them and these have become this for me.

But I admit I kind of want to stockpile a bunch of 16s.

2.5 miles this morning on progression, hopefully a HITT workout tomorrow. Maybe something easy at the gym for Thursday. Trying to work my way back to a heavier mileage before starting training.

Saturday, January 18, 2014

Maybe it is Because Dads Don't Care if Their Hair is Wet After Lunch

This week was my second back at work after maternity leave and I am still trying to settle into the schedule. Even before having the baby I had to get up early to fit my training in-- I have a long commute and I like to get to work early. Since F still gets up once a night to eat (usually around 4 am) I stay up and hit the gym and then go to work. It makes sense, and it is the easiest way to train during the week, but getting up at four is not the easiest thing to do. And it means that most of my miles are on a treadmill (it is pitch black until after 7 here so there really isn't anywhere I feel great about running outside). 

I was in training for a half marathon last spring when I found I was pregnant. I was halfway through the cycle and felt so good and strong I thought I could keep going - I would be in the early second trimester for the race and wouldn't have gained much weight. It would be fun to have a pregnant PR. But the pregnancy hit me like a sock full of quarters and I stopped running pretty quickly. That race is coming up in April and it feels like a good goal to try to do it this year. Plus, JR's work will pay my race fee and who doesn't love a free race?

That means the schedule is important and to make it work I have to do the longer runs on the weekends. This morning JR let me sleep in because I hadn't had more than five hours a night in days and I slept through my normal run time. Luckily I was able to squeeze in a couple of miles while my parents played with the kids. After so many runs on the treadmill just being outside felt fantastic and it was nice and cold. My garmin was dead so I ran a route I do all the time so I know the markers. Just a quick 3.5 miles with some hills thrown in, at a good clip for me. I felt great the whole run but my legs never really got warmed up.

The longest I've been able to run since the baby is six miles. I will need to start a training cycle for the half in about two weeks and I am not sure I am up for it. My legs are not fully back (not to mention my abs) but really it is squeezing all the training in (especially all the miles I will need to do on a treadmill) that worries me. Last year I ran downtown under the lights to fit it in but after some attacks on runners last year I am wary of being out before the sun is up.

I frequently see articles about running for mothers. They are all full of the same annoying tips. At least half of them involve running while your kids nap or having them do workout videos with you. For the most part they assume that you are a stay at home mom with kids at home. But I think for a lot of women it isn't about making it work during nap time (do we really need that tip? I think most people could sort that out) but how to make it work when you work eight hours a day and have school pick up and sports commitments and it is winter and sun is up for what feels like ten minutes a day. I would like some one to explain how I can run at lunch and not look like a sweaty mess all afternoon or how to do a ten miler on a treadmill without dying of boredom. That is the kind of tip I want to see.

So for the next couple of weeks I will keep getting up each morning and trying to adjust to even less sleep but more mileage. See if I can hit my target paces and gut out a few longer runs. And maybe I will sort out exactly why I have never seen an article for dad runners.

Thursday, January 16, 2014

New Routine

I probably came back to running too quickly after the baby.

I had a difficult pregnancy - I didn't gain a whole lot of weight but I was huge and the baby was huge. I couldn't control my heart rate so running during the pregnancy didn't work out. Each week I would get more and more upset as I could feel my fitness slipping away.

It was made even more challenging because I use running to control my anxiety and depression. I didn't realize how much I depended on running until I couldn't do it anymore. As my due date got closer I began to plot my come back.

Five weeks after a c-section, not EXACTLY with my doctor's approval, I got back on a program. Now my stitches were healed and I still had a couple of years worth of miles on my legs. I also took it very slow. I won't lie, for the first few weeks every single run hurt. I felt great during the run but for hours (and sometimes for a day or two after) my abs would spasm and hurt and even sitting up was torture. I guess having my abs cut again meant starting over and I didn't have the best core strength to begin with.

Now that I am back to work I am settling into a routine: treadmill runs twice a week before work (sign, back to getting up at four am) focusing on getting my foot speed turnover up and then a long run on Saturday (long runs are still in the 6-7 mile range) and another road run Sunday. It isn't ideal - I still loathe the treadmill - but as dark as it is here running outside in the evenings won't work and it isn't safe so early.

This week the baby has been getting up early in the morning for his bottle and I've ended up at the gym twice before 4. Just me and the steroid lifters. It is brutal to be so exhausted but I am proud that I have been doing progression runs. I turn on Sports Center (I love the 49ers and they are playing in the NFC championship this weekend so it is great to just inhale football coverage) and increase the speed with each segment. I slow down to a more natural pace during commercials and then crank it up again when the show comes back on. This prevents boredom (sort of, at least when I am trying not to die) and helps with speed.

I won't lie, I would rather the baby slept through. As much as this schedule works it is a real challenge to train on such little sleep. But I am pushing through and shooting for a half marathon in April. That feels manageable but tough. I am definitely not planning to PR but just to feel strong at the finish. Or maybe just not die. Once I can do that again I will feel like I am really back after baby.

I Need to Find My Tribe

I actually love running blogs. I think most runners enjoy the obsessive nature of the sport - mulling over training plans, plotting race dates, thinking about gear . . . all sorts of things. But I have noticed an annoying thing about most of the blogs I've run into - they feature tiny little women who complain about how heavy they are (despite many photos to the contrary) and how slow they are (with mile splits I would kill for). The average internet runner seems to be under 120 pounds and run 8 minute miles. I weigh . . .a lot more than that and run 12 minute miles (pre-baby I was at 11-11:30 and I will get there again). So their whining about a 24 minute 5K and wearing a size six makes me want to smash things with hammers.

I recognize that everyone is dealing with their own standards and maybe if you weren't an athlete before even your small frame with some muscle on it feels like a big body. Or if you ran track in high school your splits as an adult feel slow even if they are wicked fast to me. But still as much as I am inspired by some of the amazing runners out there they can also make me feel hopeless and ridiculous.

It is like running groups. I would adore a running group. But I want the slow old lady mommy running group. Where no one runs under ten minutes and everyone has the mom pooch and chub rub. I haven't found my runner girl tribe though I see plenty of us out there at races. I know that I am not alone. But it would be great to find those ladies in person and online. I love reading about those fast ladies but I would be just as inspired by someone who was working just as hard but started out more in my place.

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

What's in a Name

Long long ago I remember seeing an episode of Oprah where she ran a marathon. She wasn't Fat Oprah at that point, and she wasn't Skinny Oprah, she was my favorite version of Oprah - Strong Oprah.  Fat Oprah seemed to do shows about the emotional problems of being fat or why we eat. Skinny Oprah did shows about extremely alarming ways to eat in a disordered way. But Strong Oprah worked out and ate mostly healthy but still ate carbs and had a rack and a big round ass. Strong Oprah kicked all sorts of ass.

That episode was the first time I ever saw a person of size running. At least running for sport and not for a humiliating drudge to lose weight. She was strong. She was kicking all sorts of ass. That episode aired while I was in high school and I wouldn't start running another 16-17 years but it put the idea in my head that you didn't have to be super thin to run.

Later a friend pressured me into doing a 5K and I was frightened. Frightened of that terrible tight feeling in my chest that I remember from running in junior high (pro tip: you should not hold your breath while running you heard it here first) and scared to be last. And scared to be the fat runner.

I am not actually fat. I am a very nice respectable size 12-14. With a boobs and big German thighs and an ass. I don't have a thigh gap. I don't have six pack abs. And I was certain that I would be the only one at the 5K not wearing those little race briefs like they do at the Olympics. And that everyone would laugh at me.

Turns out the biggest gift of the road race is that you pretty much will never be the slowest, fattest or oldest one there. And that you can't look at someone and know how fast (or slow) they are. I have passed fit looking guys in races and been completely smoked by old ladies. It is incredibly liberating to realize that anyone can run. I've run in countless races in the last few years and despite being the slowest person I know by FAR I have never come even close to finishing last. And I have seen what happens when the last person finishes. Everyone cheers that person on and treats them with respect. Perhaps somewhere at some time someone has been an asshole to a back of the pack runner but I've never seen it. I still get a tiny little high when I cross a finish line - like I am mentally flipping off my junior high gym teacher (the one that could have told me to FUCKING BREATHE WHILE RUNNING maybe jocks know how to do that but I didn't).

Anyway I imagine that I run like Oprah did during that episode - she looked so strong - and once she hit the exhaustion point her form fell to shit and she flailed around a bit and lost her mind. I probably don't look strong and powerful at all but like a big sweaty flailing mess. The important thing is that I feel like Strong Oprah. And that I keep doing it.

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Booting Up

**originally posted this on my other blog but I decided that maybe it make sense to have a separate place for more running/fitnessy type things. It is entirely possible that I will change my mind again but lets give this a whirl. **

I have had an online presence since 2003 in some form or another - though I suppose dropping off the internet here for a couple of years negates that - I've been here and on Diaryland before that. I started blogging because I thought I had funny things to say about my job and my commute and anything I ran across. But of course there are a million funny writers on the internet and wow I like working so I stopped writing about my job (and deleted the hell out of the stuff long ago).  I don't blog about my kids (oh I had another baby in September!) because the internet has all kinds of kiddos. And I don't blog about my marriage because well . . .things are good so they are dull. And if they were bad well I shouldn't air that nonsense. It doesn't leave much.

I started running a couple of years ago. For me it was hard and scary and it sort of blows my mind to call myself a runner. I am definitely the kind of person who sticks with things I know I will be good at and I am not a good runner. I am too large. I am not an athlete. I am slow as hell. But after a non-running pregnancy (because that was just a disaster with crazy heart rate issues and just NO) I am trying to get back where I was. The baby is just under four months old and I started back training ten weeks ago. After my 5K detailed below I ran more races, eventually moving into half marathons. It is something that JR and I do together (though he is on the injured reserve at the moment) and it feels crazy good to do something that was a struggle for me. I am back to running four days a week and I am still large and slow and I am so thankful to be back.

My pal L pushed me to blog again - with a focus on running. I kind of doubt I will stick to just one thing but it feels great to dust the old place off and typey typey into my screen.