Saturday, January 25, 2014

Gear Score

Running articles love to trot out the idea that running is a fitness activity that doesn't cost any money. All you need is a pair of shoes and you can run. This always makes me laugh because man runners LOVE spending money on running. Sure you do see some grizzled old runners about in big cotton t-shirts and tube socks sans watch and everything else. But most runners I see like to invest in gear that makes running more comfortable and allows them to run their best. Moisture wicking clothes top that list because after a sweat heavy workout in a cotton shirt you are likely to have giant chafe marks ripped in your skin.

For me the big national brands like Nike and Under Armour have not worked. I do not have a typical runners body - I have big thighs (and not the runner's big thighs where they still have thigh gap) and a booty but with a smaller waist and I have boobs. A lot of the bigger brands seem to have taken their best men's styles and shrunk them down and made them pink. I think this works well for a lot of slimmer runners and they have no problems. Stores like Lululemon and Athleta have challenged those brands by making tech clothing that also looks great. My issues with those stores are primarily about function - sometimes they are so cute but maybe not as practical as I would prefer. And price. I don't mind investing in workout clothing but $100 running pants seems crazy. I also don't love the founder of Lululemon and would like to not ever give him my money.

So I have spent a lot of time experimenting. I have a few things from Road Runner (my favorite running store) that are very functional and practical (but sadly not always so flattering). I have a couple of things from the Gap that are pretty good but seem to be SLIGHTLY more about lifestyle than actually working out. And I do have one Lululemon shirt (that I bought at the outlet with a gift card so I try to tell myself they didn't make any money off of me) that had been my favorite - as much as I loathe the company it was just so nice and light and not too warm in hot weather and not cold in cool weather and it never even smells. But it just made me crazy it was Lulu and I wouldn't buy another.

Out of the blue JR bought me this from Oiselle. Oiselle is a Seattle running company that makes functional but stylish running apparel for women. Their shorts sadly don't work for me - but I have yet to find any that do - but their capris are the best around. This shirt is now my top choice for every outdoor run. Just as functional as the Lulu - it even has great hand coverage and is the perfect length and never rides up. At $66 it is an indulgence (and an amazing gift) but I love it and I find myself choosing it every time.

Imagine my excitement to go to a Oiselle sample sale this morning. I got another Flyte top, two lux layers (which seems to be discontinued) and a tank top (and shorts for my girl Linda). My share was under $100. For their quality and how cute and comfortable everything is (I tried on one of lux layer shirts when I got home and uh never took it off - I didn't even run and my mom tried to steal it) that feels like free.

I am still on the quest for running shorts (if I am ever going to turn myself into a summer runner they are a must) that don't provoke the chub rub but my work out wardrobe feels like it is in great shape.  I have grand plans to go to their next sale and drag Linda with me (we can run after so it will feel healthy).

No run today. Hopefully a long run tomorrow.

Thursday, January 23, 2014

Pacing

I have a hard time hitting specific paces. Training plans call for miles at ten seconds slower than race pace or something similar and I don't have that kind of muscle control. Honestly I can either run by effort or I can run at max speed. I can't manage my pace to the level that these plans call for - and I am surprised that other rec runners can.

Last week I tried to finish my run up with some strides. I can manage a sprint at the end but I did two too quickly and one too slowly. I am not sure that missing the paces means that that part of the workout is wasted or not.

My best speed workouts seem to happen by accident. Maybe my legs warm up quickly on the treadmill and I can ladder up the pace easily. Sometimes I still feel fresh after a couple of miles on the road and I will do some strides. But, more often than not, I mispace them badly and they end up being short runs with some fast and some slow miles. It doesn't seem productive.

I was reading about doing downhill workouts to build up a higher foot turnover rate. I definitely do not have the muscle strength and cardio ability to power up speed. My stride is short enough that building turnover is the way to go. It seems like it is the first thing to go when I tire, my posture stays good but it gets challenging to keep the feet churning, even when I am not struggling with the cardio bit. The training plans make increasing turnover sound simple but I find that I really have to focus and even then it is easy to let it taper off. Suggestions seem to be to run at these paces to get better at running paces. It is not so useful for those of us who are already struggling with it.

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Wednesday HITT

Rough workout this morning. The baby slept in (not a bad thing) until five (I know) so I got to the gym late. I only had a short period time so I just hammered out two miles at a ladder pace. I've been trying to stack my runs on back to back days to give extra fatigue to my legs a bit. I've been doing ok on the short to mid runs but building endurance has been tougher. Sometimes I feel like if I max out my legs than I might have a better shot at building them up a bit.

For some reason I just had to white knuckle it this morning. From the beginning my legs felt dead and heavy. Even my warm up felt like drudgery. By the time I was hauling at my max speed (and believe me I am still pokey I think it was 10:30 pace) I was playing games in my head to hang on. The first mile I did breath counting - I concentrate on getting a good rhythm of breathing going - nice and slow - and count to thirty. I can usually get a quarter of a mile in per thirty count. I tried to watch the TV on my machine but ESPN was annoying this morning and I settled on the movie Juno. This was weirdly the worst movie to try to run HITT to - just too slow a pace.

I managed to hang on for two miles and it was worth it. With my current schedule I just have to squeeze in even short runs to get my miles back up. I admit that it is hard to get back on track with little two milers, especially when I am not really up for running every morning.

There is a satisfaction in sticking out a run that isn't going well (even if it is short). It makes you feel smug to have worked out when you didn't want to. And it is undeniable that I get that physical boost from the run. But a workout like that hangs in your mind, makes you wonder if you will ever get back on track and it leaves this bad taste if your mouth.

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Long Term Committment

Most runners are obsessed with their shoes. Drop into any running message board and you will see endless threads comparing different brands and models. My pal Linda and I have email streams that go on for days about shoes - and we wear the same model.

There seem to be two camps with running shoes. Some people find a model they like and buy that model until they can't get it anymore - some of them won't even buy the newest edition. The other camp seems to jump around and trying to find the newest thing.

I am definitely in the first camp. I wear a Mizuno Wave Rider 17 and I am semi obsessed with them. My first running shoes were the Wave Rider 15 (wait this isn't true I had a pair of Brooks that were stability shoes which I shouldn't be wearing that I wore first but the Wave Riders were my first shoes that made me feel like a runner) which is a shoe model you will find so much hate for on the internet it will make you worry about people. People were ANGRY about that shoe. But since it was my first pair of properly fit shoes I adored them and eagerly upgraded to the 16. The 16 is the shoe that changed everything about running for me. They were lighter and fit me perfectly. I never had any joint pain. I was semi heartbroken when after my pregnancy it became clear I had too many miles on them. So my gift to myself after six weeks of running again was an upgrade.

The 17s are so different from the 16s it is hard to explain. They are stiffer but also so much lighter it is hard to believe. When I bought my 16s they were perfect from the beginning, no break in period at all. But it has taken me about forty miles to get my 17s just right. Now they mold to my foot and they have great grip on the road. If you don't have a shoe that you love this way get thee to a running store (I love Road Runner) and get fitted. Take your time, run in the shoes and purchase them somewhere that will let you have a few workouts with them before you committ. With luck you will find the shoes that you will buy for years to come.

This morning I did a speed workout at the gym before work. I did a progression on the treadmill for 2.5 miles, just gradually increasing the speed until it was a hard charge for the last two minutes. The best shoes fade into the run and you hardly notice them and these have become this for me.

But I admit I kind of want to stockpile a bunch of 16s.

2.5 miles this morning on progression, hopefully a HITT workout tomorrow. Maybe something easy at the gym for Thursday. Trying to work my way back to a heavier mileage before starting training.

Saturday, January 18, 2014

Maybe it is Because Dads Don't Care if Their Hair is Wet After Lunch

This week was my second back at work after maternity leave and I am still trying to settle into the schedule. Even before having the baby I had to get up early to fit my training in-- I have a long commute and I like to get to work early. Since F still gets up once a night to eat (usually around 4 am) I stay up and hit the gym and then go to work. It makes sense, and it is the easiest way to train during the week, but getting up at four is not the easiest thing to do. And it means that most of my miles are on a treadmill (it is pitch black until after 7 here so there really isn't anywhere I feel great about running outside). 

I was in training for a half marathon last spring when I found I was pregnant. I was halfway through the cycle and felt so good and strong I thought I could keep going - I would be in the early second trimester for the race and wouldn't have gained much weight. It would be fun to have a pregnant PR. But the pregnancy hit me like a sock full of quarters and I stopped running pretty quickly. That race is coming up in April and it feels like a good goal to try to do it this year. Plus, JR's work will pay my race fee and who doesn't love a free race?

That means the schedule is important and to make it work I have to do the longer runs on the weekends. This morning JR let me sleep in because I hadn't had more than five hours a night in days and I slept through my normal run time. Luckily I was able to squeeze in a couple of miles while my parents played with the kids. After so many runs on the treadmill just being outside felt fantastic and it was nice and cold. My garmin was dead so I ran a route I do all the time so I know the markers. Just a quick 3.5 miles with some hills thrown in, at a good clip for me. I felt great the whole run but my legs never really got warmed up.

The longest I've been able to run since the baby is six miles. I will need to start a training cycle for the half in about two weeks and I am not sure I am up for it. My legs are not fully back (not to mention my abs) but really it is squeezing all the training in (especially all the miles I will need to do on a treadmill) that worries me. Last year I ran downtown under the lights to fit it in but after some attacks on runners last year I am wary of being out before the sun is up.

I frequently see articles about running for mothers. They are all full of the same annoying tips. At least half of them involve running while your kids nap or having them do workout videos with you. For the most part they assume that you are a stay at home mom with kids at home. But I think for a lot of women it isn't about making it work during nap time (do we really need that tip? I think most people could sort that out) but how to make it work when you work eight hours a day and have school pick up and sports commitments and it is winter and sun is up for what feels like ten minutes a day. I would like some one to explain how I can run at lunch and not look like a sweaty mess all afternoon or how to do a ten miler on a treadmill without dying of boredom. That is the kind of tip I want to see.

So for the next couple of weeks I will keep getting up each morning and trying to adjust to even less sleep but more mileage. See if I can hit my target paces and gut out a few longer runs. And maybe I will sort out exactly why I have never seen an article for dad runners.

Thursday, January 16, 2014

New Routine

I probably came back to running too quickly after the baby.

I had a difficult pregnancy - I didn't gain a whole lot of weight but I was huge and the baby was huge. I couldn't control my heart rate so running during the pregnancy didn't work out. Each week I would get more and more upset as I could feel my fitness slipping away.

It was made even more challenging because I use running to control my anxiety and depression. I didn't realize how much I depended on running until I couldn't do it anymore. As my due date got closer I began to plot my come back.

Five weeks after a c-section, not EXACTLY with my doctor's approval, I got back on a program. Now my stitches were healed and I still had a couple of years worth of miles on my legs. I also took it very slow. I won't lie, for the first few weeks every single run hurt. I felt great during the run but for hours (and sometimes for a day or two after) my abs would spasm and hurt and even sitting up was torture. I guess having my abs cut again meant starting over and I didn't have the best core strength to begin with.

Now that I am back to work I am settling into a routine: treadmill runs twice a week before work (sign, back to getting up at four am) focusing on getting my foot speed turnover up and then a long run on Saturday (long runs are still in the 6-7 mile range) and another road run Sunday. It isn't ideal - I still loathe the treadmill - but as dark as it is here running outside in the evenings won't work and it isn't safe so early.

This week the baby has been getting up early in the morning for his bottle and I've ended up at the gym twice before 4. Just me and the steroid lifters. It is brutal to be so exhausted but I am proud that I have been doing progression runs. I turn on Sports Center (I love the 49ers and they are playing in the NFC championship this weekend so it is great to just inhale football coverage) and increase the speed with each segment. I slow down to a more natural pace during commercials and then crank it up again when the show comes back on. This prevents boredom (sort of, at least when I am trying not to die) and helps with speed.

I won't lie, I would rather the baby slept through. As much as this schedule works it is a real challenge to train on such little sleep. But I am pushing through and shooting for a half marathon in April. That feels manageable but tough. I am definitely not planning to PR but just to feel strong at the finish. Or maybe just not die. Once I can do that again I will feel like I am really back after baby.

I Need to Find My Tribe

I actually love running blogs. I think most runners enjoy the obsessive nature of the sport - mulling over training plans, plotting race dates, thinking about gear . . . all sorts of things. But I have noticed an annoying thing about most of the blogs I've run into - they feature tiny little women who complain about how heavy they are (despite many photos to the contrary) and how slow they are (with mile splits I would kill for). The average internet runner seems to be under 120 pounds and run 8 minute miles. I weigh . . .a lot more than that and run 12 minute miles (pre-baby I was at 11-11:30 and I will get there again). So their whining about a 24 minute 5K and wearing a size six makes me want to smash things with hammers.

I recognize that everyone is dealing with their own standards and maybe if you weren't an athlete before even your small frame with some muscle on it feels like a big body. Or if you ran track in high school your splits as an adult feel slow even if they are wicked fast to me. But still as much as I am inspired by some of the amazing runners out there they can also make me feel hopeless and ridiculous.

It is like running groups. I would adore a running group. But I want the slow old lady mommy running group. Where no one runs under ten minutes and everyone has the mom pooch and chub rub. I haven't found my runner girl tribe though I see plenty of us out there at races. I know that I am not alone. But it would be great to find those ladies in person and online. I love reading about those fast ladies but I would be just as inspired by someone who was working just as hard but started out more in my place.

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

What's in a Name

Long long ago I remember seeing an episode of Oprah where she ran a marathon. She wasn't Fat Oprah at that point, and she wasn't Skinny Oprah, she was my favorite version of Oprah - Strong Oprah.  Fat Oprah seemed to do shows about the emotional problems of being fat or why we eat. Skinny Oprah did shows about extremely alarming ways to eat in a disordered way. But Strong Oprah worked out and ate mostly healthy but still ate carbs and had a rack and a big round ass. Strong Oprah kicked all sorts of ass.

That episode was the first time I ever saw a person of size running. At least running for sport and not for a humiliating drudge to lose weight. She was strong. She was kicking all sorts of ass. That episode aired while I was in high school and I wouldn't start running another 16-17 years but it put the idea in my head that you didn't have to be super thin to run.

Later a friend pressured me into doing a 5K and I was frightened. Frightened of that terrible tight feeling in my chest that I remember from running in junior high (pro tip: you should not hold your breath while running you heard it here first) and scared to be last. And scared to be the fat runner.

I am not actually fat. I am a very nice respectable size 12-14. With a boobs and big German thighs and an ass. I don't have a thigh gap. I don't have six pack abs. And I was certain that I would be the only one at the 5K not wearing those little race briefs like they do at the Olympics. And that everyone would laugh at me.

Turns out the biggest gift of the road race is that you pretty much will never be the slowest, fattest or oldest one there. And that you can't look at someone and know how fast (or slow) they are. I have passed fit looking guys in races and been completely smoked by old ladies. It is incredibly liberating to realize that anyone can run. I've run in countless races in the last few years and despite being the slowest person I know by FAR I have never come even close to finishing last. And I have seen what happens when the last person finishes. Everyone cheers that person on and treats them with respect. Perhaps somewhere at some time someone has been an asshole to a back of the pack runner but I've never seen it. I still get a tiny little high when I cross a finish line - like I am mentally flipping off my junior high gym teacher (the one that could have told me to FUCKING BREATHE WHILE RUNNING maybe jocks know how to do that but I didn't).

Anyway I imagine that I run like Oprah did during that episode - she looked so strong - and once she hit the exhaustion point her form fell to shit and she flailed around a bit and lost her mind. I probably don't look strong and powerful at all but like a big sweaty flailing mess. The important thing is that I feel like Strong Oprah. And that I keep doing it.

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Booting Up

**originally posted this on my other blog but I decided that maybe it make sense to have a separate place for more running/fitnessy type things. It is entirely possible that I will change my mind again but lets give this a whirl. **

I have had an online presence since 2003 in some form or another - though I suppose dropping off the internet here for a couple of years negates that - I've been here and on Diaryland before that. I started blogging because I thought I had funny things to say about my job and my commute and anything I ran across. But of course there are a million funny writers on the internet and wow I like working so I stopped writing about my job (and deleted the hell out of the stuff long ago).  I don't blog about my kids (oh I had another baby in September!) because the internet has all kinds of kiddos. And I don't blog about my marriage because well . . .things are good so they are dull. And if they were bad well I shouldn't air that nonsense. It doesn't leave much.

I started running a couple of years ago. For me it was hard and scary and it sort of blows my mind to call myself a runner. I am definitely the kind of person who sticks with things I know I will be good at and I am not a good runner. I am too large. I am not an athlete. I am slow as hell. But after a non-running pregnancy (because that was just a disaster with crazy heart rate issues and just NO) I am trying to get back where I was. The baby is just under four months old and I started back training ten weeks ago. After my 5K detailed below I ran more races, eventually moving into half marathons. It is something that JR and I do together (though he is on the injured reserve at the moment) and it feels crazy good to do something that was a struggle for me. I am back to running four days a week and I am still large and slow and I am so thankful to be back.

My pal L pushed me to blog again - with a focus on running. I kind of doubt I will stick to just one thing but it feels great to dust the old place off and typey typey into my screen.